Currently doing its rounds on the Internet is this landlord’s email to his tenants. Rather than showing off his Mensa prowess, which I am sure was the intention behind his vile email, he had outed himself as the president of Densa. This is e-x-a-c-t-l-y how you should NOT write to your tenants:
In the famous words of the Who’s Roger Daltry I ask “Who are you?”Could you be Nigela Lawson the domestic goddess of 685 who cleans properly and on time. Or Cindy Monet? Cindy cleans on time but like her non de plume she has become legendary in 685 for her stylish brush strokes. You see, whenever our Cindy cleans every swipe she makes is visible? And last and in more ways least Miss H who when she can be asked cleans properly but rarely?
For Nigela, you are without blame, for Cindy it is a gentle prod, but for Miss H it is your final warning. 3 days from me posting up the cleaning duties you have. 3 days to find 1 to 1 and half hours to clean properly. That includes all the surfaces in your designated area including light switches and doors. I threatened in the past to inspect but never really did. BUT FROM HERE ONWARDS I WILL BE.. MARK MY WORDS. Should I ask you to do it again, let not a dog move his tongue in protest.
Special shout out to Miss H. Miss H, if you fail to do your clean within the 3 days, mark my words the next month will be the last you spend in my house. Try me at your peril. To Cindy, I say, just because you wipe...
